Cottage Memories: Chronicles of A City Boy’s Life In The Country
SEASONAL MUSINGS
By Craig Nicholson
The municipal tax roll says I’m a “seasonal resident”. Does this mean I’m also recognized as a seasoned cottager? Given my plethora of whacky lakeside experiences, I’ve certainly earned that distinction. The wife suggests that in my case, “seasonal resident” refers to my propensity for over spicing on the BBQ. Surely, she doesn’t suspect that my intense seasoning is to conceal the pungency of burnt meat.
In reality, “seasonal resident” officially designates an individual who only lives on a property for a specific period throughout the year. Yet, I have the dubious privilege of paying taxes as if inhabiting year-round. So, I try to make the most of our waterfront property investment by going to the cottage as much as possible.
That’s one reason the cottage has become a year-round refuge for many nowadays. Some have retired there. Some have moved there to live and work. For others like us, the cottage is a weekend home-away-from-home for every season. Albeit interrupted by requisite weekday excursions to our primary residence to pay the bills.
However, many folks remain summertime-only cottagers, visiting their waterfront properties only on weekends from Victoria Day to Labour Day, and closing-down for the rest of the year. Do they ever experience the colour-rioted, summer-extending days of autumn, the pristine-crispness of winter, the surging promise of emergent spring? The wife needs all these seasons to keep my “to do” list going.
Extra chores aside, these diverse seasons are equally as exciting, as unique and as beautiful as summer to me. Summer-only cottaging seems like always eating only a small part of your favourite meal or only enjoying your spouse’s company part-time. The wife quips that would make me a seasonal husband, with a warning look to be careful what I wish for.
Perhaps summer-only cottaging reflects a quest for warmth, wishing Ontario was a more like Florida, with a fantasyland called Disney World, instead of Queen’s Park. But as a man for all seasons, I’ve figured out how to stay warm throughout the year, right here at my Kawarthas’ cottage. After all, it’s much easier to get warm when you’re cold than to get cold when you’re warm. That’s why the wife ends up with all the blankets every night.
Yes, I appreciate the other seasons, when I can better control my personal thermometer. I can also achieve a level of activity, acuity and awareness precluded by constant overheating. In other words, I’m lazier, dumber and more zonked out by sweltering summer temperatures. The wife wonders what my excuse is for the rest of the year.
Is it my imagination, or do advanced technologies and space age fabrics created for warming exceed those made for cooling? What else is there for summertime cooling except sitting on a block of ice until frostbitten, swimming until your skin prunes, partaking of chilled drinks until your bladder explodes, or wearing no clothes at all? The wife says the neighbours still complain about my running around buck-naked with a frozen butt. Apparently, no one buys that I’m trying to lure away mosquitos.
Originally, the wife suffered ambivalent seasonality. She doesn’t like summer heat or bugs. But she was always cold in winter. For some reason, being cold often bothers women more than men. Maybe females just need more snuggling. But after I introduced her to battery-heated apparel, layering, and a snowmobile with hand warmers and heated seat, the wife embraced winter. I even get an extra cuddle or two on cold nights, while stoically conceding our tug of war for the covers.
Our cottaging now includes weekends year-round. When ‘the season’ ends on Labour Day, life at the lake becomes more peaceful, quiet and natural. We share nature’s complete panorama and enjoy countless extra days at our cottage. There’s a special rhythm to our year-round cottaging that’s somehow smoother, less frantic and more satisfying. Those non-summer months are also less crowded, chaotic and comparatively traffic free. What’s more, we never worry about what to bring because everything we need is already there. And I get considerable satisfaction from getting more benefit out of all those year-round taxes I’m already paying.
So, I urge everyone to consider making this the year you don’t close the cottage. Or at least to make a special effort to check out each of the other seasons, especially if you have a young family. You may be surprised to discover a whole new world that’s always been yours to enjoy. Of course, I knew that all along, Intrepid Cottager that I am.
Craig Nicholson is a long-time Kawarthas cottager who also provides tips and tour info for snowmobilers at intrepidsnowmobiler.com and for PWC riders at intrepidcottager.com.
